Yes, I Did Cry.

Yes, I DID CRY.

I once cry.

I believe, you too once cry.

I also believe, it is not wrong crying.

I cried when I was born. Who don’t, right?

I cried when I failed to get what I want. The problem is I always WANT.

I cried when I upset people. Which is all the time.

I cried when I am not anymore being paid attention to.

I cried when I am jealous. Especially to my perfect angel-like sister.

I cried when I failed my parents. I always do. And I am deeply sorry for that.

I cried when I made wrongs. Which is also all the time.

I cried when I know there is somebody crying BECAUSE of me. Which I know a lot.

I cried too much didn't I?

Yes. Too much.

Too much.

My dearest,

I often be sad, cry get mad.

But, believe me when I say, I love my life so much.

I will never trade it with someone else’s.

I love my Creator.

I love my family.

I love my friends.

I love my teachers.

I love my sweetheart.

I love my pets.

I even love my sadness.

Why?

Well, maybe I am crazy for loving sadness.

But sadness is the moment

I wake up from my dreams

I stand up in reality

I dance with pain

I clearly see myself, frowning, on the sadness

That I know, always know,

Me myself

Who place it there, on my sinful heart.

My dearest,

Judge me you please,

So I can know,

How much more sinful I can be.

Masquerading I don’t care

When people judge,

When people hate,

When people avoid,

Is very damn hard, it’s breaking my faith, my heart, my strength

Down, deep down…

But it is easier than showing it. It is much more easier.

Because I always know,

It was my fault, it is, and it always will be.

My dearest,

A drop of advice can I give

Love yourself

Don’t ever

Be like me.

Pathetic. Useless.

For when you love

Yourself

                                           You will love every others.

As I feel tired crying, so I think I’ll stop here.

Remember, I love you. Always will.

Adios.

May we meet again,

Insya-Allah.

The Untitled Me